Say what?

Helping this little Ham get dressed the other day,

"I want to to wear my monster trucks."

"Uh-oh you can't it's dirty."

"No, it's not."

"Yes, it is. Remember you wore it to co-op."

"Don't argue with a two-year-old." 

He had a sly, mischievous smile peaking out when he so apply boomeranged the words so often spoken to his oldest siblings back at me. 

Car Ride Convo

 Car rides seem to bring out very interesting conversations:

After doing our checks, Ellie asked if I was older than Daddy. (A topic that seems to totally and completely astonish our children) After confirming, yet again, that indeed I am just a bit older, Annie pipped up from the back row.

"Yeah, that's why Mommy is going to die first."

(Avery was in shotgun and his shocked expression was priceless."

Avery to Annie, "Not necessarily."

Ellie before the conversation was overtaken by older siblings explanations, "Yeah, Daddy will die first because he is taller."

Avery's face was even more aghast and he choked out to me, "Well I guess you're pretty safe because soon you'll have two sons taller than you."

The secret to a long life-live shortly.

Well Said

Tuesday I was lecturing the children before dinner about obedience and the need to improve ours in the house. The lecture was too long and too much at the end of a very frazzled day. When it was over Eleanor in her most serious, disappointed voice while shaking her little fist exclaimed, "Guys, we did not save the day!"

CONSTANCE CONTRAIRE

"Avila stuck out her tongue! Hee hee, like I do when something is really hard, like traditional dance."

Getting up next to me and sighing in a rather dramatic way so I ask, "What's wrong? Do your shoes hurt?" (Because they were too small, but she insisted.)

Looking at me as if I am complete disbelief that her mother could be so simple minded, "Your shoes can't hurt."

"Yes, you're right, do your feet hurt?"

"Noooo, my foot hurts."

About every other day there is huge battle about buckling up in the van, she insist that only I can do it and it becomes a huge battle of wills between, well everyone. After Mass recently she was insisting her way and I was not going to give in because crawl two rows back while being nine months pregnant was not happening. After several minutes of back and forth I sternly said she must buckle up!

To which she replied, "NEVER!" in such a Hollywood fashion that the entire van erupted in laughter and tears. Needless to say she did not appreciate our reaction. 

It's 34 degrees outside and Gia told her to put a jacket on before going outside and in the most inconsequential way responded, "OK, whatever." (There was no disrespect, just um okay I'll do that.)

Eleanor is so very, very Constance...she talks all the time. So one night while we are cuddling and I am fighting the head bobs, I make those, "uh huh, and oh really, and is that so" remarks and then she says, "Mommy, I'm not talking to you, I'm just talking." Relieved I rolled over and fell asleep with her rehashing her day with the most patience guardian angel of all time.

"I am not going to be a human being, I am going to be a horse. That way I am not a sister or a daughter." Told to me after she and Annie had a fight. 

Eleanor is our little conundrum, She is 80, 16 and 3 all at once. She is super sweet and unintentionally sassy, and shy and bold. She is always hot, and wears dresses, unless its bedtime and then it's no pj's at all. More tears have been shed this winter over outer wear than all tears combined in our household over clothes. She used to insisted on a bow to bed as well, but has out grown that and no is very intentional on how her is to be fixed, but you only get one shot so make it count. 

Somehow even though she is so stinken stubborn and makes for really long days, I find myself chuckling and just loving her and her ways all the more. 

Always listening

We are currently fostering four kittens with the intention of keeping one or two or three or please no don't go there.

Our efforts to get them acquainted with the outside failed miserably. They scurried to the shop, no biggie, but then they found a golden hiding spot-the engine to the van. Well, the first time I easily extracted two kittens after much pleading with St. Francis to not let me pop the hood to find bloody cats. No blood just scared little critters and all was well and I thought that was that. 

Well, two days later and we need to go and I beg Philip to check the engine before we back out...three!

After thirty minutes and many frustrated words and broom pokes that last cat came out and was caught, that cat ran back into the engine as Philip was backing out so there were words about the intelligence of this creature.

So just before we get to Gia and Poppy's, thirty minutes late Eleanor ask, "Mommee-a, Super Cute was in the engine?"

"Yes"

"And when a cat's in the engines that's why they're an idiot?"

Absolutely.

Sing-Song

It's nine o'clock and there has already been three outfit changes and of promise of many more. Her first request almost every single day is for me to turn on the Ballet music, however this request is also almost always sung with arms gently outstretched like a perfect three year old ballerina. Most request are sung and if the reply is sung back it is always heeded. She also decompresses and processes her day by song alone in her bedroom, however her voice carries so we all know what was the best part of the day and what troubled her the most. She is just so very much fun! Right now we are best friends, in her mind and I love it. She ask me daily to jump on the trampoline with her and to play house, I am the kid.

Her favorite sayings, "Wait a minute, wait a minute.'

"Actually..."

"Wait, where are my sisters?"

"I'm the ABC"

This one is because after reading The Penderwicks, we picked up the phase OAP/OAB (oldest available Penderwick/Blaxton) who is left in charge of a situation. Oh my goodness what an honor to be the OAB for those that are not usually left in charge. So now Eleanor will help me set the table and declare herself the "ABC"

Specific Prayers

Well I think God can handle this request. The caveat at the end does adds a new dimension.

"And for Bennett and Rexy and Olivia that they will be healfy and grow up to use forkes and napkins all the time."

Camping

We went camping this weekend for the first time as a family. It was camping in my books because our "Log-in" did not have running water, thus making late night bathroom trips an adventure. We carried our water around in "tin-cans",  and found lots and lots of "allergy" in the lake. Even with the rain most of the time it was such a wonderful experience with family and some really amazing friends.

This is one of those rare events where there was no pictures taken...just slowing down and enjoying life. 

Enjoy our Easter Picture instead.

Dying for Heaven

These two were doing what these two do best these days...wrestling, pestering, pushing boundaries with each other while trying not to get into trouble after Mass in the car. Avery through a giggly/slightly painful laugh, "No no, I don't want to die!" 

(Just the part I opened the door to hear; there was some sort of escalating fictional scenario happening.)

George from the back seat in all sincerity, "But Avery if you don't die then you can't go to Heaven."

Aren't we, as adults, so often focused on the wrong thing...death is not the end.

When the Cats Away

Everyday is something new with Eleanor...everyday is a new unique request.

Friday both George and Annie were at Gia and Poppy's so Eleanor's request was especially funny to me-a girl-with sisters-with closets full of clothes. 

As Philip was getting her dressed nothing would suffice and finally she said, "Mommee, come here"

"Come with me"

Hand in Hand we ended up staring in the big girls' closet

"I wear 'Stasia' mass dress."

Ummm...okay.

There will be so many peace treaties in our future.

Two days later Eleanor had a major melt down because Anastasia was going outside to play in the snow and she was wearing Mary Colette's too small boots, which all of the girls knew formerly belonged to the oldest giggly girl. Oh the tears that were shed, Eleanor so wanted and could not understand why Anastasia wouldn't/couldn't wear her four sizes too small snow boots.

There is a video...

This morning as we were cuddling when Bennett began to really holler, so in an effort to get all on board with rescuing the caged baby, "Oh I hear our Bennett! Shall we go rescue him?" in a way too excited voice for that early in the morning with too little sleep.

Her responds, "Maybe we should cover our hears." Which she did and turned into me for more cuddles.

The other evening at dinner after a full tummy she leaned back and said, "Daddy, I happy" in a rather melancholic voice. Pretty sure happy meant content and tired, put me to bed. At least that was the interpretation we went with. 

After a nights rest she came bouncing into the kitchen and asked, "Mommy, I be funny?"

"Yes you can be funny."

"Ooo-tay, I go be funny." and she bounced away. 

She was struggling to get wrapped up in her blanket so I helped, tears and tears, "No, I not be Mary" I put the blanket over her head because all the days before she would cry because her hair was cold. Oh the life of a melancholic two year old is very distressing, to her and very amusing to me. 

Grace Before Meals

Do you know why you pray before meals?

According to George, "If you sneak food before you pray then the food is moldy. So that is why you have to pray before you eat!"

Very, Very NIIIICE

Conversation this morning with Eleanor

Mommee, I miss Poppy.

Oh, do you want to see if we can get Poppy on the phone?

Nooo

Do you want to see if we can get Gia on the phone?

Yeah...Get Gia on the phone...forever?

Forever?!

Yeah, because that would be very, very niiice.

Everything with Ellie is either "Very, very niiice" or contrary. Her requested nightly bedtime songs are "Mary, Mary contrary" and "Ellie Elephant," tunes made up on the spot.

She is perpetually "Hung-y" however no source of food with alleviate this situation. And we have come to interpreted it as her own little Eeyore-ness.

She either wants 10 bows or none and she will decide, but always two rubber bands, but only occasionally two doggie ears.

When it is raining, it is" wetting".

She, for days at a time, will refer to Benedict as Norbert, especially if he is wearing light blue and/or a hood. (Throw back to Halloween)

She takes her imaginary play very seriously, as she declared yesterday, "Mommee, my name 'Little Flower'" and that was, indeed, her name all day...along with Anastasia being "Golden Hair", George was "Yo" and Mary Colette alternated between "Ella, Teacher and Mom," depending on moment. She did not miss a step during their all day long game. If you want to her silly cuteness listen to a 2 year old walk around calling "Yo" and a 5 year old answering. 

Sweet Eleanor, being in the bottom of a wide family, is perpetually exhausted, hungry and loved. There are four very eager big siblings that will read her her favorite books...those that can't read have them memorized. She has three big siblings would do anything for a snuggle from her. And now she has one big sibling that she declares she "needs" all the time.

Wiggle Worm

The other morning as Philip and I sipped our coffee and prayed together his lap was infiltrated by our wiggliest child to date. As he juggled his coffee, book and thighs from extremely bone bits he jokingly exasperated, "Annie, your entire body is moving!"

In her cute little chipmunk voice she responded, "But, not my toes."

Annie K: movement wrapped in skin since conception.

(The only baby I actually thought would break through my belly.)

Sacrifice

Today we embark on a forty days of fasting and penitence in reparation for our church. As a family discussed how priest over the years had broken the law and their bishops lied and covered. We were able to talk to the children about how lies are always found out and always cause so much more damage than just accepting consequences. It is amazing how much our children get and how they see with unclouded eyes...you do right even if its uncomfortable or even painful. We also discussed about how Jesus dying on the cross was reparation for our sins and so know we are trying to imitate Jesus with small acts of reparation, small sacrifices. So we asked for ideas, "So guys what should we sacrifice?"

In the most excited, enthusiast voice two arms in the air, "ME!"

We are not giving up Anastasia, we are giving up movies, which always hits momma harder than anyone else, treats, snooze buttons and Paul Thomas is trying not to stay up so late reading, Avery is giving up some playtime for praytime and Mary Colette wants to go to "Everyday Mass". We will do what we can and offer all that we do for the healing of our Church, the healing of the victims and the souls of priest and bishops.

Purely Felt

Lately Gia has been taking a couple of kiddos at a time to enjoy quiet time with them and a few weeks ago Avery went just by himself. When we went to pick him up Annie asked from the back of the van in a kind of panic where Avery was, thinking he might miss out on a grandparent visit. We told her that he was already there and we would be picking him up. She was content. As we turn towards the driveway Avery was up at the house and waved to us and Annie just burst out in the most pure laugh of love and excitement. She just laugh and laugh until tears were streaming down her face and laugh even more when she got out of the van and hugged Avery. He was only gone one night, but the joy of reuniting overcame her.

During the same visit Annie asked for an apple and found there were none, Gia needing to go to the store was spouting off the items she was going to pick up and said, "And apples for Miss Priss." to Annie. Then asked if Annie wanted to come to which she of course said yes, "to go to the store and to meet Miss Priss."

More recently we have given in and have started Bennett on a pacifier to which Annie calls a "suckafy" it is fitting.

Questions

Avery has always had a way with words and lately he has been asking some really thoughtful questions.

"Mommy, if someone gave you a compliment, which one would you be the most proud of?"

"Mommy when you were little what was the hardest rule to follow?"

"Mommy, if you could make up five new laws what would they be?"

Options

Recently Philip and I were talking about schooling options as our children mature. There are so many great options around here! There are great catholic schools and great catholic hybrid schools all with pros and cons. As we discussed tutions and what that money could pay for outside of a school setting, we talked about just hiring a private tutor for certain subjects as well.

Annie piped in, "A private tooter...that be yucky!"

Etched on the Heart

Written back on March 1

Today, I pray that Our Lord can make something manageable out of the mess I made.

This morning we gathered for morning prayers and memory work which is something I require of the oldest four and is the extent of George's formal teaching at the moment. After we finished I told the three oldest their assignments and who I would be working with first. We settled into the classroom and cracked open our books. The door hurriedly opened and the most precious soon-to-be-five-year-old swept in with determination, asked eagerly if he could be on "Baby Duty."  I replied, "of course" and warmed at his transition from "little" to "big". A few minutes later, I left the classroom to retrieve an item and saw four little ones, some on the table others in chairs with stacks of crackers and mountains of crumbles all over the floor happily enjoying yet another morning snack. George had risen to his duty and supplied everyone with unauthorized snacks.

I snapped because I actually didn't see the scene as I just described it. I saw rules being broken and a floor, that not fifteen minutes ago I had swept up, being desecrated again. I saw more time taken away from a daily schedule that is up to only me to keep. I saw another interruption into my perfectly planned day. I got upset and reacted poorly and stole the new found "bigness" away from my almost five year old. The word 'crestfallen' doesn't come close to describing how he looked. Broken. Confused. Pained. Slapped in the face with the reality of what happened and the reality that I could not undo what I had just done, I sobbed. I scooped up my beautiful boy and held him and apologized and told him that he did a wonderful job being on "Baby Duty" and rocked him and kissed him and ached for him and for our relationship that is now forever altered. 

I begged God to not let this happen again, but it will. I am a fallen human in fallen world. I begged God to help me take a moment longer to survey a scene before reacting. Please God, let me sort out the 'Urgent' from the 'Important' and react appropriately. Please do not let me crush these beautiful souls anymore with my self-centeredness. Let me teach them to serve by serving them. 

There's is nothing I wouldn't do to give my children unconditional, pure love and take away all past failures. Yes, I would give my life if the exchange existed. It doesn't. Not by me anyway. In a world with sin, it is what Christ, and only He, gave us.

So tonight I will beg forgiveness and beg for the ability to love my children better tomorrow, like we mothers do every night. And I will trust that God will be their All-in-All.

Friday Photo Favorites

A crazy picture that captures the spirit of this whirlwind girl at the moment.

Annie K is all in all the time, even if she doesn't know what that means. She is hitting the hard part of littleness. The part with big emotions that usually results in high pitch screaming over spilled milk. (Ha ha God, thanks for all the lessons in patience.) She loves fiercely and protects her interests with the same fierceness. She is sorting out big issues in her world lately which is very charming. 

"Mommy, where is Bennett?" daily.

"Where does Colette live?" she asked her daddy the other night. (They share a room and our house isn't that big.)

"Mommy, can you be my mom?" ummm, check.

"Can Bennett sit in my whap?"

My Aunt and Uncle stopped by to drop off an Easter basket and after they left she told me, "Mommy, I saw my new Mom and Dad." She has always been one to try to join another family.

Friday Photo Favorites

While cuddling George asked, "Is Bennett done cooking yet?!"

Another night he informed Mary Colette on Bennett's size, "Colette do you know how big Bennett is? He is the same size as a lego man."

"He was but he is much bigger now," I told him

"Yeah, he is as big a dupo-lo man."

After discussing other toy options we settled on his teddy bear for size, just not weight.